lose interests

i lose interest so easily.

on almost everything & everyone.

that's why i always treasure people who/what that actually came & stayed in my life, without being pushed away by my good and bad behaviours, or simply because they are not bored of me yet lol.

i even searched on google about the fact that i lose interest too quickly, and i always get things like ‘ That means you're (a) a human being, and (b) you're a member of the universe.’

to be honest i felt relieved reading those ‘inspirational’ explanation.

they said once you meet someone/something you're ready to settle with, you'll know it, you won't doubt or have the thought of changing in your mind, you won't feel like quitting, so it's just because i havent met the right ones. but errrhmmm really?

ugh weird. i dont think we can blame the universe or blame the people that way, i think it's about us. it's about me making changes to my life. and that action - to someone's standard - might be a bad thing, but it's ok because we live up to our standards, not others. the only excuse is that we're young really haha, we (kinda) have the right to experience more .


i change a lot. queen of changing. i can never answer why i stopped my ‘relationship’, or let's say, my interest.. with a place or a person, why? i just can't explain, i always hear this voice inside telling me what to do and omg i trust my guts so much, all.the.time, yeah i'm that one who treasure my feelings so much i have to go with its flow.

weird right. but i like it really, who doesnt like being their fucked up self, i mean everything in life happens for a reason right, i breathe that quote to live haha.

Life goes well, tho i know someday, somehow, that inner voice will strike again telling me : “Go make a bad decision, change something Kimmy”.. obviously bad decisions will always end up with an amazing outcome....in the long term...so yeah, first thing first, we gotta get over the current depressing effects from making those right. sounds like a balance to me, balance is good.


next time maybe i'll be writing about how people and places lose their interest in me, questioning why, right? hhhaha, karma wont take long eh?


©2019 by Kim Chi Sun & JMG Melancholy